Be your whole, true self – and accept yourself.

Which version of you do allow people to see?

What version of you do you allow people to see?  Strange question you might think.  Please let me explain.

When I first met Steve, who was to become my husband, I only wanted him to see the good Kate Hobbs – Kate Hobbs No. 1, you might say.  However, when we were married, Kate Hobbs No. 2 sometimes made an appearance, and certainly Kate Hobbs No. 8 started to shout around the room from time to time!

What I am trying to express is that there are many versions of ourselves.  We often don’t want the worst side of ourselves to be seen.  But every so often it appears.  Now, I know that I can choose which version of Kate Hobbs appears at any time, and I would rather that No. 1 appeared all the time, but with friends and family they get to see every version.  My work colleagues, get to see some versions but not all.

What about you?

There is a time for reality, vulnerability and honesty because no matter how hard I try, I cannot completely stop Kate Hobbs No. 8, or No. 7 or No. 6 etc., from making an appearance from time to time.  If we want true friendship, true accountability, true growth and strong character, we need to learn to accept and embrace every version of ourselves.  It is not healthy to completely crush parts of ourselves, because suppression is hard to maintain and can destabilise us.  However, we can learn to appropriately allow No. 8, No. 7 etc., come to the surface because they are part of us.

So accept who you are, be kind to yourself and allow yourself to be fully you but work on the areas you need to in an atmosphere of reality and vulnerability.

You are fearfully and wonderfully made – after all.

How are you dealing with the dirty, unpleasant version of yourself?

What strategies have you put in place to help when version No. 8 suddenly appears?

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About katehobbs

Mother to two who are now independant and living away from home. Wife to Steve, for the last 26yrs and looking forward to many more years. I have enjoyed 18 months in the Okanagan, something that I have longed to have the opportunity to do for a while. Living a dream, you could say. Now, I am interning with Living Waters Canada based in Vancouver until end of April 2013. I love to grow my own food - it tastes so much better. I also build up, train and encourage others to achieve more than they thought possible.
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2 Responses to Be your whole, true self – and accept yourself.

  1. Hi Kate,
    You are absolutely right. You have to figure out who you are and be that person. On a positive and practical note, we all have strengths. And going with your strengths and managing your weaknesses seems to me to be the optimum way to navigate your way through life. Identifying (in actionable detail) your strengths is a really energizing exercise. As to weaknesses, I accept them as part of my identity and when I view the total package in a Gestalt kind of way, I make better decisions.

    • katehobbs says:

      Hi Riley
      Thanks for your comments as always. I am so thankful that the thinking behind strengths and weaknesses has changed. Remember when they said (and some still say) that you have to work on your weaknesses? Now, it is strengthen your strengths; be aware of your weaknesses and draw others around you who are strong where you are weak. Then everyone is playing to their strengths.
      Thankfully, I can see this operating in my marriage too! Steve is a great balance to me, and as a couple, we work incredibly well together.
      I am coming to terms with me – all of me and beginning to love the good in me.
      Until next time…

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