However, many people use work as an excuse to:
- get away from family because they don’t want to be intimate with them
- gain approval from others – because they have not been approved in many areas of their own lives
- be successful – they see that winning at all costs is the only route to success and all the trappings that can go with that
- fill a gap that is missing inside them
I remember that I used to think that working hard and putting in the extra hours would bring me to the Managing Director’s attention. It did, but not in the way that I had hoped. What it did do was set a precedent and there was an expectation put on me to get into work early and go home late. This began to cause stress, both at work and at home.
It is well-known that people go to “things” to comfort them from time to time – things like food, chocolate, good food, the gym, and work. However, there is a danger that things can get out of balance, and those things we go to for comfort become an addiction.
Addictions don’t have to be of a chemical nature i.e. drugs or alcohol. There are other addictions too, and many people become addicted to work. They justify it with excuses such as:
- If I don’t get this job done then people won’t consider me for more important work.
- I’m part of a team so I need to be seen to be pulling my fair share.
- My wife is out for the evening, so I will do extra hours so that I can get a head start on tomorrow.
Work is important. I fully accept that. However, when you use work as an excuse to not relate to people, isolate yourself, not face up to reality – then you could be walking a line that may not be healthy for you.
Check out your motives for working the way you do.
Is it self-centered, or other people-centered?
Can you spend time resting, without looking for things to do all the time?
Can you turn off the Blackberry and not be bothered by that at all?
If you find that you are unsettled by your answers to these questions, then it may be time to re-evaluate a few things in your life.
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